Best BDSM dating app or site for kinky people

[BarryGiz]

I've been interested in the BDSM lifestyle ever since I first saw Fifty Shades of Grey. I knew about BDSM chatrooms and have chatted with a few kinksters about spanking - it was fun. But I never really explored BDSM dating sites until now. I’ve just learned there are quite a few apps that help people in the community find partners. I’m curious which ones are good and whether you’ve tried any.

 

[bigbill]

I've had great success on Feeld, though results can vary depending on where you are. If you want maximum options, your best move is still the big players - Tinder, Bumble, etc. Just make your BDSM interest crystal clear in your bio. Since BDSM lovers are simply a slice of the general dating pool, you’ll find them on mainstream apps too - and because those platforms have way more users, you’ve got way more potential matches to choose from.

 

[B__F]

Here’s what I know about BDSM dating sites:

1. Fetlife

More like social media for kinksters than a dating site. There are hookup groups, but it’s mainly for finding events and connecting with kinky friends. Think "kinky Facebook," but with very poor moderation and an owner who’s... questionable.

2. BeeDee

A newer dating app from the creators of BDSMTest. I’m not sure if the low number of fake accounts is because it’s new or due to good moderation. I actually met my current partner here, so I’d recommend it.

3. Feeld

A dating app focused on polyamory, not specifically BDSM, though it does have kink tags. The app itself is basic and can even expose your location too precisely. Still, it’s very popular, so you’ll find plenty of people.

4. General dating apps

Apps like OKCupid, Bumble, and Plenty of Fish let you tag yourself as interested in BDSM. This can work, but be prepared - you might meet people who misunderstand kink or use it as an excuse for abusive behavior.

5. KinkD

Pretty much abandoned. It has an auto-moderator that blocks words like “daddy” or “pain,” and there’s no way to search by distance or specific kinks.

6. Collarspace

Used to be called Collarme back in the early 2000s. It hasn’t been updated in years, has little to no moderation, and feels mostly abandoned - though it’s still online.

 

[Debra Malin]

A good place to start is Fetlife. You can also try BDSM chat rooms or go to "munches," which are casual meetups held in public places like restaurants or clubs.

There are also BDSM apps you can use. A good one is BeeDee, which can help you find Doms, Dommes, and subs.

 

[shildondick]

You can try websites like FetLife, Fetster, and Fet (the app is mostly used by straight people, with fewer LGBTQIA+ users). You can also check Facebook for local BDSM groups - many members are happy to answer questions and share advice.

Joining a BDSM forum is another great option. Forums cover topics across the entire BDSM spectrum and are excellent resources for finding munches, local events, clubs, and dungeons in your area. They’re also essential for staying connected to your local community.